Category Archives: Being a Mom

April 2014

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Wow! How time flies! It’s crazy that I haven’t blogged for 4 months. I guess that’s the life of a mom of an almost 1 1/2 year-old. Life is great and very busy. I’m always amazed at those mothers with 2, 3, 4 and 5+ kids! How do they do it?! I have so much respect for them. I recently became friends with a mom who has 9 kids. Amazing!

A lot has happened in the last 4 months. I’ve been working full-time in the NICU since December. It has been great. Matt has been able to watch Lilah while I’m at work so that has been a huge blessing for our family. He’s been able to spend so much time with her before he starts P.A. school in May. They have bonded so much and I still am able to be home 4 1/2 days per week with Lilah because of my amazing job. I’m so glad that I became a nurse. It’s a great job for a mom. I can work full-time and still be able to be at home most of the time with Matt and Lilah. They are my best friends in the whole world. I miss them when I work, but it’s also kind of nice to get out of the house to maintain my sanity. I applaud stay-at-home mothers and fathers! They truly have the most important job and the most difficult job on the planet. I would love to stay home more when Matt becomes a PA but I also always want to keep my nursing license and work 1-2 days/week or 1 day every other week like some of my friends at work do. I definitely want to keep my job in the NICU no matter what. I love it and I’m so grateful that Matt got into PA school in Utah so that I can keep my job.

Lilah has really progressed in the past 4 months. She started walking last month. It’s so cute to see her waddle around with her arms above her head for balance as she crashes into the closest thing that she can get to. I just love to see her explore her little world. She is at such a fun stage. She has started jabbering a lot lately. Nothing intelligible but she has some good intonation going on. Haha! She still is saying Mama, Dadda and dog. Those are still her main words but she said “Gramma” twice and Jack once and she approximates words sometimes. But it’s hard. We try so hard to get her to talk more. The other day in the car we were reading a farm book and I said “This is a cow. Cow. Cow. Cow. Cow. Cow. Cow. Cow. Cow. Cow. . .” Then Lilah pointed to the picture and said, “Dog?” Haha! Silly girl. She calls every animal a dog. Except sometimes she has said Duck (which sounds like Dog in reality). The other day, I think she said Frog. She’s getting there. We are very proud parents.

She’s a really good girl. She’s been teething a lot lately and her molars have been coming in so that has been hard for her but overall, she is a lot of fun and very pleasant. She is definitely opinionated though. It’s hard not to give into her. We really need to teach her sign language or something to help her not throw tantrums. I gave up on sign language a long time ago but maybe it’s time to revisit that idea.

Matt and I had the most amazing experience earlier this month. We had been preparing and praying for an opportunity to go on a humanitarian trip with the church together to teach newborn resuscitation. We got certified in Helping Babies Breath and NRP as providers and instructors. I even expedited my passport renewal just in case we got called to go.  In March, we got an unexpected phone call from Dr. Bond who said that one of the nurses had a change in plans and couldn’t go on the upcoming trip to Honduras. I told Sister Bond that we could both go and she made arrangements for us so that we could both go. It’s great to speak Spanish because we can serve on these trips much more often because of the great need for this training in Spanish speaking countries. I’m so grateful for this amazing opportunity. Matt and I went to Honduras for 9 days. I’ll write a post about it.  It has been one of Matt and my dreams since we started dating to go on medical humanitarian missions. We talked about how we wanted to do that on one of our first dates hiking up to the Salt Lake Overlook. It’s such a blessing to be able to fulfill one of my lifelong dreams with my husband so young in life. We thought that we wouldn’t be able to go together until much later in life.

I think that Heavenly Father loves me. He just keeps blessing my life and answering my prayers. I don’t deserve it either. I really struggle sometimes with doing everything that I’m supposed to do and yet, He always finds ways to reach out to me and help me to know that He is there and that He loves me. I’m so grateful for God’s mercy and grace. He really can make so much more out of our lives than we can by ourselves. He has made my life so rich. I’m sure that there are so many other blessings that He has for me if I only reached out to Him more. He’s like the best friend that is always there for you no matter what.

Our Family – October 2013

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Wow! This year has gone by so quickly! It’s crazy how fast time flies! I realized that next May, I will be 30!!! Aaahhh! I can’t believe it. I need to enjoy my 20’s while I can. Haha! I have such an awesome life and I’m loving this new phase in my life. Motherhood. It’s amazing.

Today, Lilah was so much fun! She’s almost 10 months old! I can’t believe it. She has such a fun personality. She is so happy and playful. She loves Matt and me and we absolutely adore and cherish her! She was so good in church today and she let me hug and love her today. She is usually so wiggly and on-the-go that she won’t just sit and cuddle but today, at church, she let me cuddle and hug her. It was such a gift to me. I love how she loves me. She has a really hard time when I leave her with anyone. At the gym daycare, she just cries so much that they always call me back in to come and get her. She even cries for our family when they watch her. She just has bad separation anxiety right now, which is normal. I feel bad for those who watch her but I just love how she clings to me. It makes me happy that she loves and trusts Matt and me so much.

Last night, on my way home from work, I called Matt and heard that Lilah was crying really hard as she was being put in her car seat so Matt put me on speaker and when I started talking to her, she just calmed right down and started babbling into the phone. It made me feel so good. Matt is so good with her. He took her to City Creek and had a fun Daddy/Daughter date. I’ve started working nights and weekends so that Matt can watch her and so that we won’t need daycare.

Lilah just adores her Daddy! In the morning, she’ll crawl around the house looking for him yelling, “Da?” It’s so cute! She’s got “MaMa” and “DaDa” down pretty well now! When she’s happy and playful, she’ll say, “Da Da Da Da Da Da”. When she’s upset and crying she’ll yell, “MA MA MA MA MA”. I’m not sure how I feel about that. It’s funny though. She also knows how to say dog! Every time she sees a dog or hears one bark she says, “Dah”. It’s so cute. Today, she was reading her little book and when she saw the picture of a dog, she said, “Dah”. I was amazed! 🙂 I’ve been trying to teach her sign language, and I think that she understands some of the words that I sign to her, especially Outside, Food, Drink, and Bath. But she never really signs back.

She loves to play peek-a-boo, patty cake, this little piggy and the itsy-bitsy spider. She loves to crawl around everywhere and explore her little world. She never holds still, especially when you are trying to change her diaper! She will roll and spin and wrestle to get out of having her diaper changed. It can be dangerous. Haha. She recently has started rolling and turning over when we are trying to get her into her carseat. It’s a struggle. She has never liked riding in the car. She loves to make messes and she is so good at it, too. 😉 Haha! It’s so hard to keep the house clean, but I like to let her explore. She loves to read books, go outside and swing in the tree swing in our backyard. She loves to go on walks and she even walking along the furniture herself. She reminds me of a little puppy because she will follow me everywhere and just crawl around panting with her tongue out. The other day, she was even crawling around with a little shoe in her mouth. Haha! She cracks me up. I wish I had a picture of that. She has brought so much joy into my life.

I love her laugh and her cheesy grin when she smiles so big that it’s almost as if she can’t contain her joy because she points out her chin, squints her eyes and she just has to wiggle her arms and kick her legs because she is so happy. I love when she is so tired that I get her to cuddle me and when I can just hold her and rock her while she sleeps.

Lilah loves her grandparents! The past few weeks, Matt’s mom and dad have been watching her on Tuesday nights when I was working so that Matt could go and do his calling for church. He is the Assistant Ward Mission Leader. I would pick up Lilah on my way home from work and she would always just be SO happy. One time she even got mad at me because she didn’t want to go home. Haha! Today, my mom was holding her and Lilah kept reaching for me and then changing her mind and clinging to my mom and she did that a few times. And of course there is Grandma Great! She just loves Great Grandma Thorup. 🙂 She has watched Lilah almost every Tuesday since I went back to work in March. Bless Grandma for that! Seriously, I don’t know how to express my gratitude for her service to me. I didn’t want Lilah to have to go to daycare. I’m so grateful for my Grandma loving her and caring for her each Tuesday. I’m sure Lilah will miss that.

The past five weeks I have been doing a fitness boot camp. I really have loved it. It’s helped me so much and I’ve seen big changes in my fitness ability! I went from wanting to die when I ran at 5 mph to being able to run at 6.5 mph at a 5% incline during the hour of circuit training without wanting to fall over and die. I have lost 10 lbs. and I think that I have gained a lot of muscle and lost some fat. I’m excited about it. It’s been hard to get up so early before Matt and Lilah wake up, but I feel that it’s so important. I have a lot of weight to lose. I needed to lose about 50 lbs! But now I have 40 lbs to go! Oh, man. That sounds daunting, but I really think that I can do it and I really need to. I want to start my family life off right. I want to be a healthy and active Mom! I’m also doing online weight watchers. It’s been great. My goal is to get down to my goal weight by my 30th birthday. I hope that I can do it.

Matt got an interview for PA school for Touro Las Vegas! I’m so excited for him. I hope that he gets in there. He is such an excellent candidate for PA school. It’s really hard going through the process of getting in because we have worked so hard for this goal. It is so important to Matt and me. I just pray all of the time that he can get in this year. He got on the waiting list for an interview at the U of U again. Last year, everyone showed up for their interview so he wasn’t able to interview. It was disheartening when we learned that he got on the waiting list for an interview again. We really wanted to be able to stay here in SLC. But Las Vegas would be amazing too! And it’s close enough to our family so that we won’t be completely cut off from them for two or more years. I really hope that he gets in there. We’ll see. His interview is in January. He still hasn’t heard from a lot of the other schools, so hopefully we will get more interviews. I’m very proud of Matt. He is such a hard worker and he is so dedicated to our family. I’m grateful to be married to such an amazing man who is so responsible and loving and fun to be around. Lilah is so in love with him! He is the best Dad and Husband ever! We are so lucky.

Here are some pictures from the last couple of months . . .

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A Day in the Life of Me

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Things are going great. I love being a mom. I love my family, my job, my apartment and we are all healthy, thank heaven. I have so much to be grateful for. The day to day is a lot of the same. I wake up, feed Lilah, let her play, make her breakfast, clean up the house, then let her play until she goes down for a nap around 10 AM. She’ll usually sleep for about an hour then she’ll wake up and take a bottle. She’ll play for a while and then we’ll eat lunch together. She’ll sometimes take another nap after lunch, wake up and eat a bottle around 2 or 3 PM. Play, take her afternoon nap, wake up and eat dinner, play, get ready for bed around 6:30 PM, take a bath, eat another bottle and then go to bed around 7 or 7:30 PM. I guess that’s Lilah’s schedule and not really mine, but it’s really just one and the same. She is my life. Whenever people ask me what I’ve been up to lately, I just talk about Lilah. Haha. I love it though.

It was really hard going to work at first and it still is, but now, it’s really been nice to have a break from being at home although I’m still taking care of babies while at work. I’m so grateful that we don’t have to put Lilah in daycare. Grandma Thorup has been so sweet to watch her on the Tuesdays that I work, and Matt’s new job has been awesome so that I can work some night shifts during the week and sleep while he’s home in the morning. Matt watches her on the weekends. It’s so good for them to bond. I’m grateful for such a supportive husband. He’s such a great dad and he’s the sweetest husband. He always tells me how beautiful and amazing I am, even when I don’t feel like it. He is so kind to me.

Lilah has been crawling around like crazy! She gets into everything. It’s so cute to see her explore her little world. She will follow me around the house while I’m cleaning and she’ll come and just sit by my feet while I do the dishes. It’s so sweet. She pulls herself up to stand and has started taking baths in the tub instead of the sink. She says “Ma Ma” all of the time. It melts my heart especially when she’s crying for me in the crib and says it. She gets really shy around strangers and hides her face in my shoulder. She is a great eater. Her favorite foods are avocados, especially cafe rio guacamole, black beans, all vegetables, pumpkin, chicken and she loved hummus (but then I saw that it had tahini in it and that she isn’t supposed to have it til she’s 1 because of the sesame seeds). She really doesn’t like fruit. She’ll sometimes tolerate apples, peaches and bananas but she makes an awful face every time I give her any type of fruit, except watermelon. She loves that. She loves her little puffs and is started to eat more of those. She is even starting to be able to pick them up and self feed. She loves her sippy cup and holds it herself. Water is her favorite.

We have been trying to teach her some sign language and she finally started signing drink this week, whether she knows it or not. I think that she knows what a lot of the signs means, but she doesn’t know how to sign them back. We are teaching her Mom, Dad, drink, food, all done, outside, bath, book, car, more, play, walk, diaper, etc.

Matt applied for 17 PA schools this last week. I pray that he gets in. I think that he is an amazing candidate! We worked so hard on his essay. It’s really good. It would be amazing if he got into the U of U but it will also be so much fun (and kind-of scary) to move somewhere else.

Matt and I had our 5 year anniversary this last week! I can’t believe that it’s been 5 years already! It’s gone by so fast. I love Matt so much! We’ve really accomplished and been through a lot together these past years. I’m so glad that I married Matt. He lifts me up with everything that he says and treats me with so much respect and kindness. For our anniversary, he gave me these high top shoes that I really wanted and then Matt’s brother, Chris, watched Lilah while we went to dinner at Ruby River. We then went and walked around Liberty park. He gave me this beautiful ring with my birthstone and four little diamonds. He said that it symbolized these past 5 years and the next 5 years that we will have together. He said that he would spend the next 5 years making himself a better man so that we would be even more in love the next 5 years. I want to make the same commitment. I want to be a better wife to Matt. He never criticizes me for my shortcomings but I really want to just be my best self for him and for our kids. He encourages me to do things that I love and to develop my talents. I couldn’t be more blessed to have Matt in my life. He’s my best friend. Things aren’t always perfect in our lives but we are happy and grateful for this amazing life that we will have together. I can’t wait to see what the next 5 years brings. I’m so grateful that we were married in the temple so that I can have him and Lilah forever.

Lilah – 7 months

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Time is flying by so fast! It’s really fun to see Lilah grow. She is so much fun! She loves us so much and we love her more than anything. Lilah was sitting up at 6 months and this past week she started crawling at 7 months! She is such a wiggly worm. It’s so funny. I wonder how many calories she burns every day! Our little athlete. Haha! This past week, she also started saying, “Mama”. I’ve been trying to teach her sign language for a couple of months and one of the signs is Mama. So everytime I walk into the room, I sign and say Mama. The other day, I was getting ready in the bathroom, when Matt brought her to me. When she saw me, she got so excited and said, “Mama!” I don’t know if she really knows what it means yet, but she said it like 5 more times that day. 🙂 It’s so fun. She doesn’t sign back to me yet, but I think that she may be catching on to the meaning of some of the signs. I’m trying to teach her Mom, Dad, Food, Drink/Milk, Outside, Play, Diaper, Bath, Car, Flower, All done, and Book. Hopefully she’ll start signing back sometime soon.

Things that Lilah loves include books, her blocks, Mom and Dad, avocado, vegetables, apples, her sippy cup (she get’s so excited when I show it to her), her baby einstein jumper, the swing in the backyard, water (to drink and to swim/bathe in), splashing, peek-a-boo, singing, hiking, going outside for a walk or to get the mail, the smart phone, her binky, putting EVERYTHING into her mouth and blowing raspberries. She gets shy around other people and she will hide her face in my shoulder but then she’ll warm up to them after a while.

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I love how she puts her hand like this when she gets really tired. She looks so dramatic. 🙂

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4th of July – We went to the Sandy Parade with Grandma and Grandpa Thorup. She loved watching the floats go by. We also went to Oma and Grandpa Hart’s house for a fun lunch with the fam.

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My little hiker. We’ve been on a lot of hikes this summer, Including Donut Falls with the cousins, Alta, Neff’s Canyon, Little Cottonwood Canyon hikes, etc. It’s been a fun summer.

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We had the best time at the Hart Family Cabin in Woodland. We spent time with the family, shot guns, went fishing and roasted hotdogs and marshmallows. It was a blast. Lilah loved being held by her Oma.

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Matt and I love to cuddle Lilah. Lilah usually squirms away but this time, she was loving cuddle time with her Dad. Matt and Lilah adore eachother. Lilah gets so excited everytime that Matt comes home from work.

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Last week we went up to Alta to go and see the wildflowers. I’m always amazed at how beautiful it is there and it’s only 20 minutes from our house!

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This was at the Days of ’47 parade downtown with my family. They all slept on the street overnight but we just showed up in the morning. It was a lot of fun. We then went to Oma and Grandpa Hart’s house for dinner and after Lilah went to bed, Matt and I watched the fireworks from our backyard. It was the best 24th of July ever!

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Lilah – 6 months old!

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I can’t believe that my little bug is 6 months old already!! It’s gone by way too fast!! Time needs to slow down. We love everyday though. It’s fun to see her grow and learn. She’s like a pet. I always show people her new tricks when we go places. Lately, her new tricks include rolling around like crazy, eating baby food, sitting up by herself and standing when you hold her hands. We think that she is so smart. We laugh all of the time. She is such a happy baby and she is really smiley and fun. I love her laugh. Matt tickles her all of the time with his nose and she belly laughs. She is starting to get shy around strangers. She’ll hide her face from them by putting her head on me. It makes me feel good that she knows me and that she loves me. She loves peek-a-boo and she smiles at everybody. She especially loves to watch her cousins play. She loves to watch little kids.

We had fun going to the zoo with Angie and Grandma. We were so impressed how Great Grandma just hopped up onto the merry-go-round animal. She’s amazing! Lilah hated the merry-go-round to say the least.

Lilah has such funny hair. I love it. It’s grown so much since she was born. She was really bald on top for a long time with a few long Homer Simpson hairs. Her hair was really long on the sides and on the back. I had to trim her hair a little on the sides of her head because they were getting into her eyes. She has a bald patch on the back of her head from it rubbing on the floor when she’s playing. Her hair cracks me up. It’s starting to grow in on the top now and it’s looking really cute. It’s really straight like Matt’s hair but I think that it may be brown like my hair. It’s lighter on top but really dark on the bottom by her neck. We’ll see.

She goes to Great Grandma Thorup’s house on Tuesday’s and Matt watches her on the weekends when I work. We are so grateful for Grandma Thorup’s help. Lilah loves Grandma Thorup! We are signed up for the IHC daycare for the fall, but because of Matt’s new job, we probably won’t need it which is great because it’s so expensive! Lilah will probably get too busy for Grandma when she starts crawling so I’ll be able to watch her. I work 2 days/week. My shifts are 12 hours long but I could work weekends and some nights during the week. Matt can watch her during the mornings while I sleep until he leaves for work in the early afternoon. It’s awesome. I love Matt’s new job schedule. I love being able to see him more. He works closer and he gets to ride his bike to work. He really loves that. It’s not his dream job but it’s great until he gets into PA school.

He’s working on his applications. He wants to apply to around 25 schools this year to make sure that he gets in. I think that he will be a great PA and I really hope that he gets into the U of U! But if not, I will be so happy to follow him anywhere. He is such a supportive and kind husband. He takes such good care of Lilah and me. A lot of times, I don’t feel like the most attractive woman with all of the spit up on me and my mommy clothes but Matt tells me all of the time how he thinks that I’m the most amazing woman to him and that he loves me so much. He is so sweet. I love him and I’m so lucky to have him. He is the best dad to Lilah. She adores him. She gets so excited when he comes home from work. He reads her stories and takes her on walks. He plays with her on the floor and rocks her to sleep. He takes naps with her, changes her diaper and gives her baths. He cleans the house a lot and he is always so fun to hang out with. Lilah and I are super lucky to have such a great man in our lives. Thanks for all that you do, Matt! We love you!

The church contacted me a couple of months ago about going to Ecuador on another NRP trip but I said no because of my new little baby. I’m a little sad about it because I love Ecuador so much and I love going on those trips but my little baby is more important to me right now. I hope that I can go again in the next couple of years though! I did take Lilah with me on the last trip to Colombia, she just wasn’t born yet. 🙂 I hope that one day, Matt, Lilah and I can all go on a humanitarian trip together. I would love that! That’s one of my dreams.

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Crying Over Milk

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I’m so sad to say that I’ve had to stop nursing Lilah. It’s been so sad. I’ve struggled with my milk supply for the whole 6 months and I’ve done almost everything to increase my supply. I rented a hospital grade pump and used that for a long time and I power pumped almost every night for months. I then started using domperidone. It really helped my supply but then I started getting heart arrhythmias because of it.  So that was a little scary and we decided that I’d better stop using it and not risk my health. When I stopped using it, my supply dropped a lot and now I am almost done. I started taking the mother’s milk supplement, more milk special blend. That was really good and I wish that I would have started with that instead of the domperidone. After the domperidone, I was really too low on my supply for it to work.

It breaks my heart because nursing my baby was one of my big dreams in life. I wanted to go until next April (16 months) to get her through next winter but I didn’t make it. I did make it 6 months though, so I’m happy about that. I’m really grateful for the time that I was able to nurse Lilah. I’m really going to miss it. I bonded so much with her through breastfeeding and I feel bad that she can’t benefit from that anymore. I feel a little guilty about stopping but it’s so hard to try to nurse her with such a low supply and to do the bottles because Lilah gets so frustrated and I never know when I need to feed her. I think that it will be easier for her to just do all bottles.

There are a lot of things that I’ll do differently the next time. I will definitely pump a ton for the first few weeks to get a good supply established and if my next baby sleeps through the night so early, I’ll pump more at night. I wish that I would have known that this time around but oh, well. Sad day. I’ve cried a lot about it. It was really important to me, but the most important thing is that Lilah is healthy and she is. She is healthy and happy and for that I know that I am SO blessed! We are trying to figure out our new schedule with the bottles and solid foods.We’ll get there. I wish that motherhood came with a manual on exactly how to do everything. That would be nice, because I feel like I am winging it and most of the time I don’t really know what I’m doing. Can someone please make that manual for me? Thanks!

Even though I don’t know what to do all of the time, this still has been the best 6 months of my whole life. I LOVE YOU, LILAH! You are so special to your Daddy and me! You mean the world to us!! We are so proud of you!

Mexico 2013!

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We went to Mexico in May with all of my family! It was so much fun!!! We went to Cozumel and stayed in an all inclusive resort. We had a blast!!! It was a slower paced trip because of the baby but we didn’t mind. We stayed at the resort for the whole week except when Matt and I got to go scuba diving. The food was so amazing and the beach was beautiful! We had so much fun with my family. My parents, brother, sisters, brother in laws, sister in law, and all of my crazy nieces and nephews were there. I LOVE my nieces and nephew so much and I can’t believe that they are growing up so fast! They all adore Matt so much. It’s really cute. It was amazing to get to spend a whole week with them. We loved it!

Lilah was 5 months old during the trip. We were a little worried about how Lilah would do on the airplane but she did great on the way there. She got a little fussy on the way home, but we survived.

Matt and I were able to go scuba diving. It was amazing to experience that with him. It’s like another world down there. We saw tons of fish, lobsters, crabs, and a few giant sea turtles. Matt went diving most of the days. I went with him on a night dive and then two day dives on the last day.

Lilah LOVED the trip. I think that she just had so much fun being held and cuddled all week. She loved to be with the family. She was very popular at the resort. Everyone thought that she was so adorable with her sunglasses and swimming suit. She went swimming for her first time in the pool and she fell asleep while floating on the water with her life jacket. It was so funny. We are so lucky! Thanks Mom and Dad for a great trip!!!20130611-013158.jpg20130611-013229.jpg20130611-013302.jpg20130611-013359.jpg20130611-013432.jpg20130611-013522.jpg20130611-013601.jpg20130629-114848.jpg20130629-114932.jpg20130629-120616.jpg20130629-120636.jpg20130629-120654.jpg20130629-120839.jpg20130629-120921.jpg20130629-120935.jpg20130629-120959.jpg20130629-121013.jpg20130629-121031.jpg20130629-121052.jpg20130629-121110.jpg20130629-121123.jpg20130629-121210.jpg20130629-121219.jpg20130629-121236.jpg20130629-121247.jpg20130629-121259.jpg20130629-121313.jpg20130629-121332.jpg20130629-121345.jpg20130629-121414.jpg20130629-121431.jpg20130629-121450.jpg20130629-121506.jpg20130629-121519.jpg20130629-121531.jpg20130629-121542.jpg20130629-121620.jpg20130629-121634.jpg20130629-121646.jpg20130629-121657.jpg20130629-121804.jpg