After our ordeal on Wednesday, I have just been a mess. I’ve been so emotional. Matt has been awesome! He has deep cleaned our whole house and he has been so kind and loving. I’m really grateful that I have him. He is my best friend and we tell each other everything. I’m glad that I have him to talk to. He is such a good listener and this experience has really brought us closer together. I am so in love with Matt.
It was really hard to go to church today. Not because I didn’t want to go. I love going to church every week but it was hard because everyone is so nice and happy and they all ask me how I’m feeling. No one knew what happened and I just broke down and cried a couple of times because I just felt so sad and emotional about everything that’s been going on this week with our pregnancy scare. It was hard to be around people today. I talked to Christina in the bathroom and was just sobbing to her so I had to go home. I was supposed to teach the Young Women lesson so Matt volunteered to teach it for me because I didn’t think that I could get through it. He’s so sweet. I felt much better after taking a nap and reading some church talks.
I feel bad because I feel like my faith is so weak. Heavenly Father promised me in that blessing that I’d be able to continue on with the pregnancy but I just was so shaken by what happened on Wednesday that I’ve just been so emotional and worried. I need to trust God more. I’ve prayed a lot for comfort and I’ve felt it when I’ve asked Him for it. I am really grateful that I can pray to my Heavenly Father and be able to communicate with Him that way. It gives me so much peace and perspective to know that He is always there for me and that He knows exactly how I’m feeling and what I’m going through.